I’ve been getting a lot of stick recently for my lack of german progress. Its definitely deserved, I’m not proud that after six months here I still don’t own a german dictionary (hangs head in shame). In person I cant really set out my argument and excuse my ignorance. Before i’ve even started I’m shot down by whoever’s backed me in the corner this time. Its that um huh. here you go. Take the shovel simple English man, dig you fool, dig look that gets me every-time.

I’m all for the being multi-cultural, I mean some of my best friends are multi-cultural (that joke will probably only work on the english). I’m a child of europe. But I think there are some very overlooked positive reasons to not learn the language of the country you live in. I’ve picked up the shovel again now, I plan to dig a little bit until its roomy and warm and then I’ll bury myself:

The main reason, is a little something I call Inner Peace.

Your head is so wonderfully quiet. Its like a TV on mute, I get the pictures but none of the annoying chatter. After a while you really can turn down everything else. I’ve become a master at blocking out conversations that happen around me. In england theres the constant distraction of being nosey:

What are they saying? Geez, their dull. What are they talking about now? Getting drunk. Very original. She did what? No way! Do you think there married? I don’t know she sounds way smarter than him. Perhaps he’s rich, or a cuban drug dealer. Women like danger, and cuba. Well he doesn’t sound Cuban. No that was probably a silly idea. I expect he’s a banker.

Sure theres plenty to look at, but its much easier to block it out if you want to. You just dont look. Then its quiet again…aaah, back to planning world domination and other trivial tasks.

My favourite chinese proverb (everyone’s got to have one, right?) is “more than half of what we see is behind our eyes”.

 

To most of us this is a bun, to the religious its Mother Theresa re-incarnated as a pastry.

Reality is what we make it, neo. I think a lot of what I love about Germany stems from the little that I understand about it. Reading the book is always better than watching the movie right? In my head, Keanu Reeves can act. In reality he’s a somewhat handsome plank, and thats being harsh, on the plank. In my head (ie the book) german people are wonderfully interesting, intelligent, funny and kind. In the movie, no doubt alot are, no doubt a very similar % to that of english people.

“I couldnt sleep last night?”
“Oh, why not?”
“I was troubled”
“By what?”
“I think mainly the uneven distribution of the worlds wealth, we have so much when others have so little”
“Yep, we should really do more”
“Totally”
“Shall we join a commune and refuse to spend a single penny again for the rest of our lives?”
“That would be totally sweet. I can grow my hair some more, change my name to “Liberty” and shed my life of servitude”
“Yeah we should probably sit around chain smoking and drinking beer for a bit longer first though right?”
“Yeah, no rush”
“Shall we get a sausage?”
“I’d bloody love a sausage about now.”
“Cracking, I’ll get a round of sausages in.”

If I knew what they were saying, it would probably be something like this

“I couldn’t sleep last night?”
“Why’s that?”
“Bit hot, I think”
“Yeah me to. I was thinking of getting one of those fans, their cheap in lidl right now.”
“Can get a bit noisy though, if your trying to sleep with the fan on”
“Yeah that is a concern”
“Shall we get a sausage?”

You can guess which one brings me greater happiness. More reasons to be ignorant in future posts. I’ve got a 101 of these. If i’d spent as much time learning the language, as I have thinking up excuses for why I haven’t, I’d could bore germans with this dribble every-night.